Dating 101: Know Yourself

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I believe the best thing anyone can do is to invest in themselves and become a whole person. You must know how to love yourself before anyone else can love you, so knowing yourself is very important in dating. When I’m dating men I have a goal, and that goal is to walk down the aisle and marry my husband. I am very clear with my intentions and expectations because I am not in the business to have a boyfriend just because nor do I want to play with people’s emotions and waste time. My dating experiences recently have been quite interesting to say the least.

I was on a date with a guy, physically he was fine beautiful skin, good teeth (I have a thing for a man with good teeth and a nice smile) established career, and a great personally. We been on two dates and since then both got busy with work and other things. He texted several times and stated how he missed me and wanted to see me, but what aggravates me is there was no action behind it. The “want to see me “messages aren’t flattering until you actual show me. To make a long story short, he then says he is busy with work, he travels a lot, and he doesn’t want to be selfish with his time.

The root of the situation is he didn’t want a relationship. I am OK with that, I just wish he would have told me that from the beginning. I find it hard for men to be open and transparent. If you are dating other women, looking for something casual, or you don’t want a relationship say that. I don’t think it’s fair for a woman to spend time, get to know you, catch a little bit of feelings, and have that conversation and you say, “oh I’m not ready for that right now”. Allow women to make the decision to deal with you or move on.

Be Clear in Your Communication

Dating is asking questions. A lot of times we are so moved by the first date and how we are being treated we don’t really ask those important questions. I think it is important for both parties to make their intentions clear in the beginning. It will steer clear from the confusion, the worry, the stress and mind games that comes with not knowing. For my women we are emotional beings. It is OK to be selfless with your emotions and guard your heart. Most women want to be intentionally pursued, not someone to fill a man’s time with.

Creating a Path to A Serious Relationship

Being upfront and honest will aid in the process leading toward marriage. If a man is intentional, honest, and unafraid to explain his pursuit of you, he is also intentional about marriage. The beauty about knowing yourself and your desires will lead to a clear understanding of each other’s motives.

Fiana Moore